Friday, September 09, 2005

The Service Industry: Dealing with morons since the dawn of time.

To all my fellow comrades who have fought along side me for years in the thankless, dirty, and frustrating trenches of the service industy: I commend your efforts. This blog is dedicated to all of the people who have ever been stiffed by customers, asked their age 99 times a night, had their asses pinched, been puked on or in the vicinity of, had to clean puke, wait on bachelor/bachelorette parties, I SAY THAT ONE AGAIN, Wait on bachelor/bachelorette parties, and listen to the general annoyance of women with shrill high pitch voices screaming about nothing while some asshole in a suit clicks his fingers at you as if your a fucking butler.

I am not your slave, I simply provide your drinks asshole.

Whew! Now that I got that out of the way, I have to say to all the people who shake their heads at this blog thinking, "Well you chose to work in a bar!", Shut up. Just shut up.

I think now would be an appropriate time to break out my vision of how to make this world a more liveable place. I think it should be mandatory (like civil services in Germany) for every high school graduate to work in the service industry for at least 2 years.

Reason #1- You learn the value of hard work and earning money

Reason#2- You absorb an endless amount of manners about how you should behave in public. (Due to the fact that you realize that most people do not have any)

Reason#3- You become a generally more considerate person to other people in social settings. (However, you do run the risk of completely losing respect for all human beings at the same time.)

Its amazing to me how close to animals people really are. NO really. Currently aside from a social experiment I call "corporate hell", I work in a music venue/bar. And over the years working at various establishments, I have realized that people, no matter what background or race or religion, all share one very common trait.

Manners.

Yes folks, manners. I have come to realize that we have stumbled upon a point that all people regardless of class or gender, all seem to fall short on.

I wont bore you people with the details, but lets just say this, I could write this blog for 4 days without stopping, just on the stupid things people have said to me, or done in my presence while in a bar/restaurant.

And we are talking everyone. Example: Man walks into the bar I work at. See's a bar full of people and a band playing on stage and asks "Do you guys have live music tonight?" Am I missing something? Does the loud music and people playing guitars escape this guy that easily?

Apparently. It happens at least twice a night!



Or my personal favorite on a slow night: "Where is everyone tonight?" I am often tempted to slap people upside the head, but I usually just reserve to my handy dandy sarcastic response of, "I don't know, I thought they were all with you."

Anyway, I dont mean to rant......actually I do, but the point is, try to be a bit more aware of your surroundings people. And no, despite what you might think, I am not pulling in hundreds of dollars a night, thats what strippers make, so dont be so fucking cheap!

Thank you for listening. I must leave now to go spend another night "Serving" you people. I just hope this blog gets to you in time.